Awakening
by LiizzzyyRAWR
Summary: Rachel's dreams come true when she gets the lead role in a broadway musical, just as Finn realises the mistake he made when he let Rachel go. Finchel.
1. Wild World

Rachel didn't know how to feel. She was excited, very excited, but there was a small part, a very small part of her that was sad to have to say goodbye. She sat alone in the choir room, ready for the first Glee Club rehearsal of 2011, and possibly her last Glee Club rehearsal ever. The other Glee Clubbers made their way in, everyone talking about what they did over the Christmas break. Rachel watched Finn walked in, their eyes locked for a second before they both quickly and awkwardly pulled their gaze elsewhere. They had not spoken over the holidays at all. The breakup had not affected Rachel well, the first week of the holidays Rachel spent most of her time in her room, singing along to sad songs and crying. Things got better after she got the news she had been waiting for her whole life, she thought about Finn less and less everyday.

"Okay!" Mr. Schue said enthusiastically as he entered the choir room "Happy New Year, everyone. I hope you all had fantastic breaks. I trust you've had enough time to share your holiday stories. Regionals is approaching fast and we have lots of work to do!"

"Excuse me, Mr. Schue." Rachel raised her hand.

"Yes, Rachel?"

"I have an announcement to make. Do you mind?" Rachel said as she stood up, smoothing her skirt.

"Is it really necessary?" Mr. Schue asked, knowing what Rachel was like.

"Yes. It is." Rachel stood in front of New Directions.

"Go ahead then." Mr. Schue said as he sat down at the side.

"Thank you. I'm just here to say practice hard and that I hope you all do great at regionals...without me."

"What?" Several members of Glee said in surprised unison.

"I'm leaving McKinley."

"So you're running away? You can't stand being here if Finn won't have you?" Santana said rudely. Rachel smiled.

"No. A few weeks ago I sent an audition video to New York and a couple of days ago I got a call saying I got the part." Rachel said with a huge smile on her face.

"What is the part?" Mr. Schue asked curiously.

"I'll be playing Wendla Bergmann in Spring Awakening on Broadway." Rachel said proudly. Mr. Schue's mouth dropped open.

"Well, congratulations, Rachel."

"So first Kurt leaves, now you." Mercedes said "We don't stand a chance a regionals."

"You did fine at Sectionals without Kurt and I."

"You were at sectionals, Rachel." Mr. Schue said.

"Yeah, but I didn't have a solo, and we still won."

"When do you leave?" Finn said quietly, it was the first thing Rachel had heard him say since they all left for Christmas.

"Um, in three days. I'm going to live with my aunty in New York. Today is my last day enrolled here."

"Well, we are all very happy for you, but it'll be sad to see you go." Mr. Schue said sincerly.

"Thank you." Rachel said happily and sat back down.

Glee went on as usual, arguing over songs, stressing about having enough people and talking about the schools they were up to compete against at regionals. Rachel sat off to the side and gave the occasional comment during rehearsals, there was no point in her doing much since she wasn't going to be around much longer. Ten minutes before the end, Finn raised his hand. Rachel had seen his whispering to a few of the other Glee Clubbers during rehearsals, he was one of the only people who hadn't approached her and congratulated her on getting the role in one way or another.

"Mr. Schue, I have something we would like to perform before we all leave." Finn said.

"Sure, Finn." Mr. Schue responded and told everyone to sit back down to watch. Finn stood at the front, looking nervous. Rachel didn't want to get her hopes up, but she wished it was something for her. He whispered in some band members ears and the music started.

"_La la la la la la la la-a, la la la la la la la-a..._" sung Puck, Quinn and Tina. Then came in Finn's voice that Rachel had forgotten how much she loved.

"_Now that I've lost everything to you._

_You say you wanna start something new,_

_and it's breakin' my heart you're leavin'._

_Baby, I'm grievin'._

_But if you wanna leave, take good care._

_I hope you have a lot of nice things to wear,_

_But then a lot of nice things turn bad out there._"

Rachel looked over at some of the other Glee members whispering to each other. She smiled.

"_Oh, baby, baby, it's a wild world._

_It's hard to get by just upon a smile._

_Oh, baby, baby, it's a wild world._

_I'll always remember you like a child, girl._"

All that drama that was the relationship of Rachel Berry and Finn Hudson came into Rachel's mind. How she had wished for Finn to like her, for so long and then one day, he did. Finn looked awkward, but he continued to sing.

"_You know I've seen a lot of what the world can do_

_And it's breakin' my heart in two._

_Because I never wanna see you a sad girl,_

_Don't be a bad girl._

_But if you wanna leave, take good care._

_I hope you make a lot of nice friends out there,_

_But just remember there's a lot of bad and beware."_

As Finn sung the chorus he finally gained the courage to look at Rachel, she felt herself getting caught up again and simply forgetting all the time she spent over the Christmas break convincing herself he wasn't worth it.

"_Baby, I love you._

_But if you wanna leave, take good care._

_I hope you make a lot of nice friends out there,_

_But just remember there's a lot of bad and beware._"

'_He was worth it._' Rachel thought, she felt tears well up in her eyes, she tried to discreetly wipe them away, but it was hard to be discreet when the eleven other members of the Glee Club and the teacher had their eyes on you. Finn sung the chorus one last time and for the first time since she got the call informing her she got the part, Rachel realized how much she was going to miss Glee.

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**To continue or to not continue? That is the question.**


	2. Goodbye

**Authors Note: HEY! Thank you heaps for all the positive feedback. It's been great. This idea just came to me when I was listening to the Spring Awakening soundtrack, and to be honest I didn't think I was capable of writing such fluff. The fluff levels will go down in the next few chapters, so you can stop throwing up. Also, I know that Wendla Bergmann is a pretty mature role and that Spring Awakening is a bit explicit and in real life they probably wouldn't have a 16 year old play her, but this is fiction so we can just pretend that is how it actually works, yeah? I feel like there's something else I wanted to say but I can't think of it.**

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All eyes were on her. In some ways she kind of liked it. The drama. But this was her future, and no one, not even Finn Hudson could stop that, no matter how crazy she was about him. She stood up slowly. Finn was standing still, unsure of whether he should move or not. Rachel quickly made her way out of the classroom, stopped just outside the door and slid down the wall onto the floor. She was fairly certain no one actually saw her crying, she sat for a few minutes trying to collect herself before Finn slowly opened the door and sat down beside her. "I'm sorry, Rachel."

"For what?" Rachel asked "Breaking my heart or making me remember what I've been trying so hard to forget?" she said through sobs.

"Everything." Finn said "I'm sorry for judging you so harshly before thinking about what I had done. I'm sorry for being completely self absorbed and I'm sorry it took the news that you're leaving for me to do anything about it."

"Someone once said something along the lines of 'it's too late to apologize' to me." Rachel said as she stood up, wiping away her tears and turning away from Finn. Finn stood up behind her, put his hands on her shoulders and gently turned her to face him.

"I get it if you don't want to go into all this, but if you're going to leave, I want you to leave knowing I'm sorry I was stupid enough to push you away." Finn looked down at Rachel as she wrapped her arms around his waist, he put his arms around her.

"I'm sorry too." Rachel said as she let go of him. "But I'm still leaving. I'm glad it's not on bad terms."

"Yeah." Finn sighed.

"I have to go back and say my final goodbyes." Rachel wiped her face and took a deep breath. "Not that anyone'll care."

"They won't know what they had until it's gone." Finn said, Rachel smiled as she walked in. It wasn't as emotional as Rachel had hoped, even though everyone was pretty nice to her, even Santana. They all wished her luck and she left, leaving her email address with a few Glee members. And that was it. The end of William McKinley High School and the end of New Directions.

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It was still dark and the streets were empty at 4am when Rachel's dads were driving her to the airport. Rachel stared out the window as her dads told her how often and when she should call them. Rachel was starting to get nervous. What if they didn't like her in real life? What if they sent her home? She didn't think she could stand that kind of rejection. "You okay, Rachel?" Her dad, Hiram asked from the front passenger seat.

"Yeah, yeah. I'm fine." Rachel answered.

"You don't have to go if you don't want to." Leroy told her.

"I know. But I do want to. You know that." Rachel smiled.

At the airport Rachel said her goodbyes to her dads and promised she would call at least every second day. She sat at her gate listening to her iPod. She had half an hour until she had to board her plane, she felt her bag vibrate at her feet and figure it was just a text message from her dads, she got her cell out of her bag and looked at the screen, it read: **1 new message from: Finn. **Rachel hesitated before pressing the **read** button.

_Hey, Rach. I don't know what time your flight is leaving, I'm sorry if I woke you. I just wanted to tell you that I'm happy for you. I'm glad your dream has come true. I didn't yesterday, I was just thinking about how much it sucks for me that your going and not about how great it is for you. I love you, Rachel. I really do. Over the break I realized what a jerk I was to you, I thought about how I was willing to let you tell me the truth about you and Jesse and how I for some reason I thought it would be a good idea to keep the truth from you. I know I was mad at you for cheating, but then I remembered that I'm no better, because I kissed you several times when I was dating Quinn, once was when I knew she was pregnant and still stupidly believed the baby was mine. You know what separates you from me? The fact that even though you cheated, you at least had the common decency to tell me, when you easily could've kept it from me. I wanted to make it right when we got back to school, but then you said you were leaving and it was like being punched in the gut. It seems like we are never ready for each other at the same time, if you know what I mean. There is so much I would change if I could go back in time. I'd just tell you the truth that day in the choir room when we both lied. Then none of this would've happened. I needed to tell you I'm truly sorry, Rachel. If you don't forgive me that's fine, I understand. I just wanted to let you know that I'll be here in Ohio, waiting for you, even if you are sick of waiting for me. Good luck in New York. I'll be thinking of you._

_Finn_

Rachel read it twice, she didn't know if she should reply or not. She read it one more time, then turned her phone off. She was flattered to have Finn, McKinley High's star quarterback hung up on her, Rachel Berry, bottom of the social ladder. But she couldn't afford the distraction when she was about to be a star on Broadway. Rachel turned off her cell just as they started boarding her plane.

_Watch out New York, Rachel Berry is on her way._

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**PLEASE review. :)**


	3. Breakeven

**A/N: Okay, so I know I said it would get less annoying in the next chapter, but I lied. NEXT chapter should be better. I have a plan *dododododo*. Also, thanks for you reviews, the more I get the quicker I want to finish the next chapter for you guys. :)**

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Finn kept his phone near him, waiting for an answer. Nothing. He should've guessed. He just had this expectation that as soon as he was ready for her she'd come straight back to him. He should've realized this wasn't the case. Last time he told her that he wanted her back she was already with Jesse St. James. He regretted taking that risk again.

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After an hour long flight, Rachel arrived at JFK. She met her Aunty Christine, who insisted on being called Chris, and they went back to her apartment and Rachel unpacked a little. Chris went to work after Rachel assured her she would be fine on her own for a while. Rachel got her cell out of her purse and sat on her bed. She turned it on and read the message from Finn again. She couldn't possibly leave him without an answer for so long, so she began to type:

_Finn, I don't really know what to say. You know I've had a thing for you for god knows how long now. But maybe dating the school's quarterback was too good to be true. I love you, you know that, I just need a little time by myself. To think about what I really want. I could do the long distance thing with you, but I don't know if that's what I really want right now. I think I just need to focus on my future for a while, until I'm used to this new lifestyle. You know how I feel about you, Finn, how I've always felt about you. It's just time I think about how you feel about me. I don't want to be hurt again. Not now. Not while everything else is going right for me. Please understand, Finn. And please keep in contact. The last thing I want is to lose you as a friend as well._

_Rachel._

She read it over before pressing send. Now she just had to call her dads to let them know she landed safely.

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Finn's cell vibrated in his pocket. He was on his way to school. He quickly got his cell out of his pocket and read the message. It was better then he thought it would be. If she wanted time that's what she'll get. He could wait for her, that was easy. And if they got to Nationals in New York maybe he could see her again. He just had to hope that she wouldn't meet someone else who wouldn't take her for granted.

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Kurt wondered through the empty halls of McKinley, the school he was harassed at until he had to leave. It was raining outside and Carole had asked him if he could pick Finn up from school because she or Burt couldn't make it. Kurt just had to find him. He checked the choir room, but it was empty, the next place to check would either be the football field, the locker room or the auditorium. He decided to check the auditorium first so he could avoid the football field and the locker room. As Kurt walked towards the auditorium he heard music, he stood on the doorway of the auditoriu_m and watched Finn on the stage. _

"_I'm still alive but I'm barely breathing,_

_Just prayin' to a god that I don't believe in._

_Cos I got time while she got freedom._

_Cos when a heart breaks no it don't break even."_

Well Kurt knew what this was about. He got a text message from Mercedes yesterday telling him about Rachel, plus Finn told him when he got home.

"_Her best days will be some of my worst._

_She finally met a man that's gonna put her first._

_While I'm wide awake she's no trouble sleeping,_

_Cos when a heart breaks no it don't break even...even...no"_

Kurt slowly moved into the auditorium, staying out of Finn's sight. His fascination with Finn ended long ago, but that didn't mean he didn't love to listen to him sing.

"_What am I supposed to do when the best part of me was always you?_

_And what am I supposed to say when I'm all choked up that you're ok?_

_I'm falling to pieces, yeah,_

_I'm falling to pieces."_

Finn sang the chorus with so much passion that it actually frightened Kurt a little.

"_They say bad things happen for a reason,_

_But no wise words gonna stop the bleeding._

_Cos she's moved on while I'm still grieving._

_And when a heart breaks no it don't breakeven even...no."_

Finn sang the chorus again as Kurt quietly sat down in a seat to the side.

"_Oh you got his heart and my heart and none of the pain,_

_You took your suitcase, I took the blame._

_Now I'm try'na make sense of what little remains, ooh,_

_Cos you left me with no love and no love to my name."_

_I'm still alive but I'm barely breathing_

_Just prayin' to a god that I don't believe in_

_Cos I got time while she got freedom_

_Cos when a heart breaks no it don't break_

_No it don't break_

_No it don't break even no."_

Kurt stood up, and Finn saw him, but he kept singing until the song had finished. Kurt clapped, since Finn knew he was there. "What are you doing here?" Finn asked.

"It's raining, I'm picking you up. Dad and Carole both couldn't make it, Carole didn't want you walking home in the rain."

"Okay," Finn said as he picked up his bag and walked off the stage "How long were you there for?"

"The whole song, sorry. You sounded really good, though." Kurt replied as he joined Finn who was walking out.

"Thanks."

"This whole Rachel thing has really got you down, hasn't it?"

"I guess." Finn said, watching his feet as he walked.

"You know, if New Directions beats The Warblers and Vocal Adrenaline, you could visit her in New York when you go for nationals."

"We both know thats a stretch, plus, we've lost two of our best singers and we don't even have 12 members at the moment."

"Maybe positivity is a good way to go."

"Well it hasn't gotten me anywhere recently." Finn remarked. Kurt felt that this would be a very long and awkward drive home.

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**Song: Breakeven - The Script**

**A/N: Yeah, the ending of that chapter is pretty crap, I know. But if I kept going this chapter would be far too long.**

**ALSO: Just a little unrelated note. I live in Queensland, Australia and as you may or may not know there is some pretty severe flooding going on here. Thankfully none has affected my home, but others have been forced to evacuated their homes because of the flooding, having to leave things with all kinds of sentimental value behind. So PLEASE, if you could donate to the flood appeal it'd be great. Think about it, how long do you have to work to earn a few dollars? People have worked their whole lives for their homes. I'm just trying to raise awareness here, don't feel you have to, I've just seen some of this flooding and it made me want to do something.**

**Go to: www[dot]qld[dot]gov[dot]au[slash]floods[slash]donate[dot]html or google 'Queensland Flood Appeal'**


	4. A Not So Pleasant Surprise

**Authors Note: I don't really have anything to say except thanks for all the reviews, they really are great, they make my day. Also, I'm really tired and going to bed right after I post this, so I haven't read it over.**

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Rachel had to admit, she was pretty bored. Rehearsals started the next day, but for now, she had nothing to do. She promised her dads she wouldn't go out by herself and Chris was always at work or working. Rachel had spent the last three days practicing like crazy, she was glad she had the apartment to herself most of the time to do so, she didn't want to feel like she was annoying Chris when she was working. It was the awkward period of time after dinner and before bed where Rachel wasn't really sure what to do with herself. She opened up her laptop and checked her email. Nothing. She wasn't surprised. She logged into facebook, not that she used it much, just to see what people were up to. It's was the same stuff that was always on it. People playing games and complaining. Then a chat message popped up at the bottom corner of the page.

**Kurt:** Finn's been sulking.

**Rachel:** Really?

**Kurt:** Really.

**Rachel:** About me?

**Kurt:** Yes. I caught him singing 'Breakeven' in the auditorium the other day.

**Rachel:** That's hardly sulking. It's a good song.

**Kurt:** That's not all.

**Rachel:** What else?

**Kurt:** Just general sulking; not talking much, only comes out of his room for meals and school.

**Rachel:** What about at school?

**Kurt: **I can't provide you with that information. You'll have to ask someone else.

**Rachel:** Oh, I thought someone might have told you. It's not like I have anyone I could ask.

**Kurt: **I'm sorry Berry, but your disastrous love life is not the only thing I talk to people about. Look, the reason I'm telling you this is because I need to know when you are going to put him out of his misery.

**Rachel: **So suddenly _I'm_ the bad guy? Like he didn't put me through misery. I can't just forget that. I did something wrong, I know, but I'm not the only one. I just need time to think.

**Kurt: **Calm down, Rachel, I wasn't attacking you.

**Rachel: **Sorry.

**Kurt: **Okay, so I know you two have your issues, but you're not the one that has to put up with sulky Finn. It's not fun.

**Rachel: **I understand. But ultimately, what Finn does is up to Finn.

**Kurt:** I know. Okay, I have to go now. Just promise me you'll do something.

**Rachel:** I can't promise that anything I do will change anything.

**Kurt:** Goodbye.

**Rachel:** Bye, Kurt. Thanks for the info.

**Kurt:** I was only thinking of myself. Oh, and congrats on getting that part. I'm jealous, but I always knew you'd make it.

**Rachel:** Thanks Kurt.

_Kurt is offline._

Rachel didn't know what to do with this information. She felt terrible, she knew how Finn felt, because he had let her feel the same way. She shut her laptop and fell onto her bed. One the one hand, there was her, she had her heart broken but then she got this great part in a great musical, which was a big step in fulfilling her. On the other hand Finn realized that he made a mistake, but it was too late to change it, she'd moved on. Finn still had to go on as usual, his dream wasn't coming true. Rachel stared at the ceiling. She couldn't lose sleep over this, her first rehearsal was tomorrow. She needed to clear her mind of Finn, she couldn't afford to not be completely awake and alert in the morning, she was already extremely nervous. A good nights sleep was what she needed, but it wasn't going to be easy.

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After a fair bit of tossing and turning, Rachel did get to sleep and she woke, had breakfast, showered and rehearsed a little without thinking of Finn too much, she had bigger things to worry about right now, Finn could wait. She had to prioritize. Chris showed Rachel the way to where she would be rehearsing for the next 2 months. Rachel found her way to a large group of people, a middle aged man holding a clipboard approached her.

"Now, who might you be?" he asked Rachel.

"Rachel Berry." Rachel responded. The man checked his clipboard.

"Rachel Berry," he turned to another man who had just approached him "Wendla is here. We are just waiting on our Melchior then I think we can start." he turned back to Rachel and looked her up and down, she felt uneasy "You don't look like you're from Manhattan. Where are you from?"

"I'm from Ohio." Rachel replied.

"What a coincidence, the guy playing Melchior is from Ohio too, I think." he said. Then Rachel heard a surprisingly familiar voice come from behind her.

"Rachel?" Rachel turned around in surprise.

"Jesse?"

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**A/N: Bum bum buuuuum. Just wanted to spice things up a bit. ALSO, I (obviously) have no idea how anything works, so please inform me or deal with it. :)**

**Anyway, please review, I'd love it if you did.**


	5. Jesse St James

_"Rachel?" Rachel turned around in surprise._

_"Jesse?"_

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This was the last thing she expected. Out of all the people in all the world, the person who would be playing her love interest was Jesse St. James. The very same Jesse St. James that used and humiliated her. She was desperately trying to hold it together, hoping it was just a nightmare. "What are you doing here?" Rachel asked, she instantly regretted asking such a stupid question.

"I'm pretty sure it's for the same reason you are." Jesse replied confidently.

"Wait, you two know each other?" the man asked.

"Unfor-"

"Yes." Jesse cut Rachel off.

"Hm. Small world." the man said as he turned and left them.

"You can't be here." Rachel said, there was a huge knot in her stomach that seemed to be tightening. She turned away from him.

"All right, everybody, take a seat." a mans voice came from the other side of the room.

"Look, please wait for me after rehearsals. We obviously need to talk about some unresolved issues." Jesse said before he headed towards the seats.

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Kurt passed Finn's bedroom door and saw him sitting on his bed and playing a video game, he looked hypnotized. Kurt stood in the doorway and knocked on the doorframe, Finn looked up. "Can I come in?" Kurt asked.

"Sure." Finn responded, still focusing on the tv screen. Kurt awkwardly walked in.

"You know you look like a zombie when you play those games."

"That's not what you wanted to come in for." Finn responded. Kurt sighed.

"I spoke to Rachel last night." Kurt said. Finn paused his game and looked up, saying nothing. "Well, not spoke, facebook chatted."

"What did you say?" Finn asked.

"Nothing. Just a general conversation." he lied, he didn't need Finn getting upset at him, not at the moment.

"Did she say anything about me?"

"She asked how you were." Kurt lied again, there was a time for the truth, but this wasn't it, he knew Finn would just get pissed if he knew Kurt had just outright told Rachel that he was 'sulking'.

"And you said?"

"The truth; that I don't know because you spend all your time in your room."

"Okay..."

"She's...confused."

"I know." Finn moved his attention back to the tv.

"Finn," Kurt said just before Finn unpaused the game, Finn looked back up. "_Are_ you okay?"

"I'm fine." Finn answered, then tried to get back to his game.

"You and I both know that's a lie." Kurt interrupted him.

"If you know the answer, why ask the question?"

"Because I'm tying to get something out of you. Carole is worried about you, you know."

"She shouldn't be."

"Shouldn't she?" Kurt asked. Finn was silent. Kurt sat down in Finn's desk chair. "Finn, we just don't want you to be unhappy."

"Well unless you can turn back time..."

"Time travel isn't the only solution."

"You got any up your sleeve?"

"I'm no cupid, but maybe you could try talking to her. I mean, actually talking, not texting or IMing or emailing. Call her tonight and if she picks up, have an actual conversation."

"And if she doesn't pick up?"

"Cross that bridge when you get to it."

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"Rachel? Where are you going?" Jesse ran up to Rachel as she was leaving rehearsals for the day. Luckily she didn't have to interact with Jesse too much today.

"Home." Rachel said as she sped up her pace.

"To Ohio...?" Jesse asked, confused. Rachel spun around to face him.

"No. I can't and I won't pass this up. If I pass it up there are plenty of girls who want this just as much as I do and one of them will willingly take my place. So, no. I'm not going."

"Rach, we are going to have to do this sometime, we might as well get it over with now." Jesse said. Rachel sighed.

"Fine. Say what you want to say." Jesse took her hand and took her away from the doorway. Rachel pulled her hand away when he stopped.

"Okay, I know we have our issues, but this is our futures, our big breaks, we can't afford to screw that up over whatever went on between us. We just have to get over it or forget it."

"Remember that time you called me out the the parking lot so you and your vocal adrenaline buddies could throw eggs at me? And I know you knew how much that would affect me. You didn't just crack an egg on my head, you made me think that maybe you weren't such an asshole after all. That's pretty hard to get over, let alone forget." Jesse looked ashamed, but he'd tricked her before.

"Look, I'm sorry I did that. I didn't want to. I was forced to. That Finn guy was better for you, anyway." Jesse said pleadingly. Rachel scoffed.

"No one was holding a gun to your head."

"I know. I just needed to be accepted by them again, and that was what I had to do to get that." Rachel turned and started to walk away, but Jesse ran in front of her, blocking her path. Rachel could feel people's eyes on them now. "When I told you I loved you I meant it, you know." Rachel stopped.

"You used and humiliated me. That didn't feel like love."

"I really am sorry, if I could go back in time..."

"Hm. Maybe Finn, you and me could work all together and build a time machine."

"What?" Jesse had no idea what she was talking about now.

"Jesse, don't worry. I'll be civil with you. It's going to be awkward doing some of our scenes for a while, but we'll get over it eventually." Rachel turned and walked out, this time she wasn't stopped by Jesse. Jesse looked around and realized everyone left in the room was looking at him.

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Finn decided to take Kurt's advice. He sat on his bed and stared at his cell's screen. Rachel's name was selected. Finn wondered if this was an alright time. She could be busy. What if she ignored his call? What if she answered but they started to fight? Finn's thoughts were interrupted when his ringtone gave him a fright. Rachel's name was on the screen. Finn pressed the answer button, "Rachel?" but all he could here was crying. "Rachel!" he panicked.

"Finn?"

"Yeah. Are you okay?"

"Yes. I just..."

"Just what?"

"I just wanted to talk to you."

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**A/N: I can't say I'm overly happy with that chapter, but I feel it's an improvement on my last one. **

**Please review. It's so good to read what you guys think.**


	6. Talking

**Author's note: Thank you so much for all your reviews, they really do mean a lot to me. This chapter is a LOT of talking, so sorry about that. **

**Just in case: I'm NOT going to use St. Berry, so there is no need for you to get upset.**

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"Rachel, Why are you crying?" Finn asked, even though she said she was fine he still thought something bad could've happened to her.

"Jesse St. James." Rachel replied, she was slowly calming down.

"Jesse St. James? What about him?" Finn was thoroughly confused now.

"He's here."

"What do you mean?"

"He's Melchior Gabor."

"What? Who's that?"

"My character's love interest. In Spring Awakening"

"Oh."

"Yeah." Rachel sniffled.

"What are you going to do?"

"I can't leave." Rachel said. Finn's heart sunk a little. "He apologized. For the egg incident." Rachel said quietly.

"And you believe him?"

"He sounded sincere."

"You know he's fooled you before."

"I know, but I think I'm going to believe him this time. He seems different. He doesn't have any Vocal Adrenaline friends to impress here. Plus, I don't want to spend my time here hating someone I have to work closely with."

"You're not going to..." Finn trailed off.

"Not going to what?"

"You know, date him again." Finn said almost silently.

"No. I'm not. I just want to be on good terms with all the cast. Look, I shouldn't have called. I'm sorry." Rachel felt stupid for calling. She pulled the phone away from her ear and went to hang up.

"No, no, no! Rachel!" Rachel heard faintly coming from the phone, she pulled it back up to her ear.

"Yes?"

"Don't hang up." There was silence "Just before you called I was just about to call you."

"Why? I've been horrible."

"So have I." Finn said shamefully.

"I think that maybe" Rachel paused between each word "as much as I hate to say it, I don't think there's any hope left for us."

"Don't say that. You can't mean that." Finn felt like he'd been punched in the stomach.

"Finn, a whole new world is opening up for me." Finn was silent "Broadway is what I've always dreamt of, ever since I can remember. It's my dream. And if I have to share it with Jesse, so be it."

"Rachel, I'm sorry."

"I know you're sorry, Finn. I'm sorry too. But even if we do try the long distance thing, it won't be the same. And there's no certainty I won't get lied to and hurt again. There's no certainty _I_ won't hurt _you_ again."

"There's never any certainty, Rachel. Nothing is certain. You of all people should know that." Rachel was silent. "I can either let you be the one that got away and regret it for the rest of my life, or fight for you and at least say I tried."

"We won't even see each other."

"What if I came up for a weekend? We could talk in person, it would be better. I have some money saved up. I'm sure I could afford the flight, at least." Finn was talking extremely fast now. She wanted to see him again so badly, and just hug him, over the break she had forgotten how much she needed him.

"Finn. Don't waste your money. I don't really have that much free time anyway." Rachel didn't want him coming up to see her when he would just ending up spending time by herself.

"But when you do?"

"When I do I'll let you know." Rachel paused. "I'd really like it if you came up to see me. And I'm glad you haven't given up. Just let me get settled here first. I have to go. Goodbye, Finn."

"Rachel." Finn said just as Rachel pulled the phone away from her ear.

"Yes?" Rachel said as she brought the phone back to it's original position.

"I still love you."

"I love you too, Finn. I alway have. Even when I didn't want to. Goodbye." Rachel went to hang up the phone for the third time.

"And Rachel?"

"Yes, Finn?"

"Watch out for Jesse. Don't let him play you again."

"Don't worry, I'll be careful."

* * *

Rachel turned up to rehearsals the next day feeling better. She wasn't so worried about Jesse anymore and she hadn't completely screwed it up with Finn. Things were improving. Rachel was early. She sat down on one of the seats at the side of the hall. Not long after she sat down Jesse approached and sat next to her.

"Jesse." She greeted him.

"Rachel. How are you this morning?" Jesse asked.

"I'm...really good. You?"

"Great." Jesse replied. Rachel smiled.

"How's this for civil?"

"Pretty good if it can stay this way."

"Let's just pretend we never knew each other before yesterday." Rachel suggested.

"That sounds good." There was a moment of silence before Jesse spoke up again "Rachel, I'm just curious. Yesterday you said something about Finn. What happened between you two? If you don't mind me asking." Rachel sighed.

"I'm sorry, Jesse, but that's a long story for another time. Basically he lied, I went crazy, I screwed up."

"And now?"

"I guess you could say it's on the fence."

"It's hard to believe he'd do anything to jeopardize your relationship, he was just about obsessed with you when we were dating."

"We only met yesterday." Rachel reminded Jesse, he was confused for a second before he realized what she was talking about.

"Right. Sorry. May I ask you one more question, though?"

"You can ask. I can't promise I'll answer."

"What did Finn lie about that was so bad?" Jesse asked.

"As I said, it's a long story for another time. Anyway, it's pretty stupid now I'm looking back."

"I won't judge." Jesse said "And we have plenty of time.' Rachel sighed, she figured she could use this information as a test, a test to see if she could trust him again. Plus, everyone at McKinley knew, what was one more person?

"You know that night when we were going to..." Rachel had a little difficulty saying it "have sex?"

"Yes."

"Finn said he was going to sleep with Santana that night. When we got to school I told him I did it, and he told me he didn't." Jesse nodded, Rachel continued "I didn't want to seem like I chickened out like a loser. Although, now I'm glad I did. No offense."

"None taken."

"Anyone, one day when we were together I told him that I lied about us. Later I found out that he lied to me too. He did sleep with Santana, and I found out in the worst way possible, from her in front of the whole Glee club."

"That's pretty harsh."

"What really got me was he let me sit there and tell him how sorry I was for lying to him, when he just sat there and didn't say anything. And how I had to find out. And the fact it was _Santana_. I mean, if it was Brittany or even Quinn I think I'd be able to deal with it a little better. But for weeks the image of them together...it was like it was burnt on the insides of my eyelids, every time I closed my eyes or tried to sleep." Jesse was silent "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have told you. It's all pretty stupid." She didn't understand why she was talking to Jesse about this.

"It's not stupid. Santana is, for lack of a better word, a slut. What if he got an STD or something off of her then gave it to you?"

"I never thought of that. I'm sure he would've used protection, though."

"Yeah, probably. But it's not stupid, you have every right to be upset. And you'd be surprised. I mean, look what happened to Quinn."

"I guess. You have a point." Rachel looked at the ground.

"I think this was just what you needed." Jesse said, putting his hand on her shoulder.

"What was?"

"To talk about it. I mean, who have you talk to about this?"

"Um. Puck a little, I guess, hardly. You know I don't really have any friends. And I couldn't talk to my dads about it."

"Wait, so he lied, you went crazy, when did you screw up?"

"I wanted him to feel like he made me feel, he just didn't get how it made me feel. I sort of...made out with Puck. I wish I didn't. I wasn't thinking. I took it too far. I felt really bad and I told Finn, and he broke up with me. It's all my own fault, really."

"Well, I can see why you did it. Maybe you went about it the wrong way, but you had your reasons."

"What happened to you, Jesse?" Rachel asked.

"What do you mean?"

"You're being so...nice."

"I was always nice to you, Rachel. You just remember the bad things."

"Well, they are the ones that stick out, I guess."

"Come on." Jesse stood up and held out his hand "Rehearsal is starting." Rachel smiled and took his hand.

* * *

**A/N: I've decided to make Jesse a good guy. There will be awkwardness, etc, but I just wanted him to be her friend, since she doesn't have many. There will be no romance for those who are worried.**

**Please please please review, the more reviews I get the more determined I am to get up another chapter. Love you all.**


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